the S friend

Last night I had dinner with some old high school friends. We sat around eating dessert, commiserating about getting older and life in general when someone brought up the topic of “sex friend.” One of the chicks has a friend who has “sex friends.” It means exactly as it sounds. She has friends, as in people she knows, whom she can call up and have sex with; no strings attached. They do not get into a GF/BF relationship but have sex and remain friends. And there is the mutual understanding that when you are no longer single then you are off the available-for-sex list. Can someone say “fantasy come true”?

It’s like I could so use a sex friend right about now. Instead of calling up a friend to go out for dinner, you would call them up for sex. I guess you could also have the dinner too. And since it is someone you know, I guess it’s safer than having sex with some stranger that you pick up at a bar or off the street. The big ticket is you don’t get into a relationship, or at least you’re not supposed to. I’m sure there is some sort of intimacy involved, not like wham bam thank you ma’am (although I would be okay with that too). But there are no emotional ties afterwards aside from those between platonic friends. You wouldn’t ignore your sex friends if you saw them on the street or by the water cooler at work but I guess it wouldn’t be like “yeah, sex was great last night, eh?” (Sorry, but I’m Canadian after all, eh?) And you are free to have sex with other sex friends.

Now that I think about it, I don’t know if I would be able to be just a sex friend (not that I have the option or anything like that). I don’t know if I would be able to deal with the no emotional ties beyond that of a platonic friend thing. It would be too weird knowing that she’s sexing up other people, which may potentially include MY friends. Or how about sitting next to quiet, nebbish Suzy in a meeting knowing that last night in bed she was a sweaty, screaming wild woman. And there is the icki-ness of that whole “swingers” idea that comes to mind; nasty married couples swapping wives and husbands, having nasty weekend orgies, etc. But I think the sex friend idea is a lot more subdued. It’s probably not like she’s banging all her friends every night. It’s probably like she’s got one or two friends whom she can discreetly “get together” with every once in a while. It sounds more like a quiet little thing, sorta like a friend helping out a friend.

I think I would make a good sex friend. With my regular friends, I’m known to be easy going, reliable and always willing to help. It’s like who do they call when they need help fixing the toilet, or putting in a new counter top, or a drive to the airport? I’ve been known to even go out of my to help a friend in need. Hint, hint, nudge, nudge.

I didn’t know chicks were into this, although I don’t know if this is common or whether her friend is just a freak. And it’s like how do you become sex friends? I would guess that you already know each other pretty well to even get to the topic of sex friends. There would have to be some sort of physical attraction too. I don’t think you would become sex friends with someone you find physically repulsive. And what if one of the sex friends is not “good”. I mean if your performance is not up to par, if you fail to satisfy, are you demoted from sex friend to just a friend? How do you tell a sex friend that they’re not pushing the right buttons? Is it like telling a regular friend that they have bad breath? How would you explain your sex friends to future girlfriends/partners/wife, or you don’t? Now that I can’t get this idea out of my head I wonder if I’m going to look at my chick friends/coworkers differently.

That’s some weird, bizarre shit. But I still so need to get laid. Sad.