SMS what?

Last night I went to some SMS messaging party at Havana. SG was on the VIP list because he knows the people who were organizing it. I was his guest, NOT his date. Shit, don’t even go there. This is how it works. You go register your info and phone number, and then you’re assigned a number, i.e. 426. You wear this number somewhere on your body, preferably where people can see it. If anyone is interested in you they can text-message you using your assigned number. It’s supposed to be all anonymous so the other person will only see your assigned number. Simple concept really, kinda like a meat market by numbers.

Me with my dinosaur of a phone didn’t even have SMS text messaging capability so I could only receive messages. The first hour you got all these people looking down at their cell phones as they text message their friends to see if it worked. After that it was the typical club scene, everyone dressed to impress trying to look cool with a drink or smoke in their hands, cool guys standing on the sides checking out chicks, cool chicks walking around in groups of threes single file looking like they have a purpose. The whole time thumping music and flashing lights in a packed, smoke-filled, dimly lit room. You have to yell to be heard and ignore the constant bumping and jostling by the crowd. You are in a room with 200 complete strangers yet you constantly feel bodies against yours. You get a casual smile or a second glance. It could mean anything or nothing at all.

Okay so I’m not into the club scene anymore. And I didn’t get any text messages either. We left around 1:00AM and they were handing out little gift packages whose contents included one Trojan brand condom maybe with the idea that the text messaging will result in many people not going home alone. Um yeah thanks but I won’t be needing that tonight. We walked around looking for a place to eat but it started raining so we decided to head back uptown for the late-night Chinese restaurants. We got into serious conversations about money, careers, relationships, familial obligations, ethics of strip bars and porn, and chicks. I got home at around 3:30AM and crawled into bed only to drag my ass out of bed this morning to come into work.

Well of course now I want to get a new cell phone with SMS text messaging. I think I’ll take advantage of that Telus deal where you get $150 off a new phone if you sign for three years. Yeah, I want something small and sexy, like myself. Harharharharhar. Puke.